The Other Side of Starlight

Today, the best students I've ever had the good fortune to teach have graduated from eighth grade to ninth.

The high schools are blessed to have them. I will miss them dearly. My heart hurts and I'm melancholy, but in a good way.

I've yet to fully process their absence. It's difficult for me to comprehend that these wonderful, exuberant young people who have been a part of my daily life for two years have now moved on. We won't see them every day in the halls. We won't get the play by play account of their lives, nor will we see their performances in band, or choir, or theater, or in the talent show. This is the hardest part of being a teacher, I think. I've never been good at letting go. I worry, and I wonder. A comfort for me is that we'll have the familiar faces of our current students to keep us nattering away. Next year, we'll marvel about how much they are growing, and how mature, and how interesting.

It is as it should be, of course. Time moves along, and their lives grow and gain momentum as they propel forward through life's resplendent journey. Each one is a brilliant star, full of hope, full of potential. I really believe they will one day light the way. Many of them have already begun.

And my seventh graders who are now moving to eighth: we survived the year, stronger now, and smarter. You've proven yourselves able and more. You made it, and I'm both proud and impressed.

Love and peace,
Ms. H

x-posted to myspace and livejournal.


Also, now that the school year is officially over... I might get some of my life back. We teachers live half-lives during the year.

Much happiness today, as I've learned that one of my poems, Porter Middle School, has been pulished in Issue Magazine. The editor said he will also publish another one in the June isse of Issue, but he has not yet made his decision about which. I'm thrilled because I've submitted six poems in recent months, so to have two of them placed after so long with nothing published is encouragement to keep submitting. Here is a link to the website for Issue Magazine, where you read find the poem.

I've also updated my Book List to include The Road, by Cormac McCarthy, one of the grimmest books I've read, as well as Pride and Prejudice, the classic by Jane Austen.

Happy Good Friday, everyone!
Today's post contains a newly-updated Book List, now with the links to each book added in from Amazon.com. My reading goal for this year is 34 books; I've just finished the tenth.

I'm also finally getting around to posting the essay I wrote for my brother for his birthday. Titled
The Story of My Childhood, this essay is part of a series of stories I'm writing as a Christmas gift to my famil. Since I've been teaching Seventh Grade, I've had a lot of practice in the form of essay writing. This is just one of the finished ones I have to offer right now.

In other writing news, I am still tinkering with the untitled Connor/Faith one-shot, which was promised to my beta and roommate, Mattallica, as his birthday gift. However, I must admit the passion has gone out of it since I have finished Anywhere Out of This World. My focus has shifted to the novel project I've been working on for the last decade. Over Spring Break, my daughter and I took a research trip to my hometown, which rekindled my desire to finally get this story written. Thanks to the fandom, I know I can write something start to finish. Before Buffy, I never knew I had it in me to follow-through.

With the school year in full fever, and the TAKS test hovering over us like an enormous storm cloud, I feel painfully out of touch with the LJ community. But I wanted everyone to know that I miss you and long for the summer, where I can fully indulge myself in your wonderfulness.

Wow, it has been a while since I've posted anything of substance. However, today, I am updating my Book List and adding one small Andrew and Dawn desktop. I am still working on a Connor/Faith one-shot, which began as a birthday gift for my beta, Mattallica. Yeah... his birthday was January 5th; I'm still a little behind.

Here is the link to the new desktop image, titled Watchers.

And here is the updated Book List 2009.

I hope to post more soon, especially since we are traveling to my hometown during spring break to begin research on a true-life novel. This makes my Mom very happy. She still grumbles at every minor mention of fanfiction. I also have a short essay titled The Story of My Childhood, which I wrote for my brother's birthday in February. Once I have the final edit ready, I'll be posting that here as well.


And, just for the sake of posterity, I think that Ozymandias from Watchmen was unexpected hotness. I mean, I fully intended to watch and enjoy the movie... but Matthew Goode as Adrian Veidt was an added bonus.

It's cold outside today, and I've remained snuggled on my living room floor in front of the Lappy, toying with the last sections of the epilogue to Anywhere Out of This World. Katya is still in her night gown, the cats are sprawled lazily on the couches, and all of the housework remains piled up, as it has since Christmas break. Katya has almost watched the entire series of Friends in the time it's taken me to write the final 10,000 words of this story.

I have twice submitted the epilogue to my beta, but he's very gently and sagely suggested that I hadn't tied up all of the loose ends yet. He was right, of course. I was pushing to finish, but I wasn't done.

Here's the final part:
Answered Prayers, the Epilogue to Anywhere Out of This World
Word Count: 9,500
Pairings: Buffy/William, Dawn/Andrew, Faith/Connor, and Helli/Oz
Rating: PG-13 for graphic violence and some sexual situations.
Summary: I tried to leave everyone in a good place. That doesn't mean that they all have a happy endings. Some end up in very lonely situations, which I know they will have to work through later. I'm saddest for Faith and Connor because I tried to write them a happy ending. Every revision that wasn't the final copy rang false for them.

I have lived with and loved these characters for so long, it seems strange to me to have typed the final words of the story. I'll miss them all so much.

To the people who read and encouraged me, who stayed with me even though at times I thought for sure I had gone crazy - thank you dearly. This experience has enriched my life beyond words.

I just returned from a walk around the neighorhood with my daughter. It's dusk and the sky was a frosted blue, with a Cheshire cat moon smiling down on us. We were visiting one of her friends whose family had just moved in to one of the new houses that have been built in my Mom's and Dad's neighborhood. As we strolled along the freshly-minted sidewalks, listening to the birds and the breeze in the cedars, I remembered walking through this area before the streets were paved, dreaming of the night that Buffy made a wish to bring William to her.

It's unbelievable to me that after so long, I have finally reached the end of this story. Last night, while sitting at my writing desk, typing up the rough draft of Chapter 71, I got teary-eyed more than once. Not only because the characters had been through such a life-altering ordeal, but because I am going to miss them. For four years, these characters have taken up residence in my head - and I mean that in the non-crazy sense - and made my life somehow more special.

I also have been blessed to meet many new and lasting friends through the Buffyverse. So many people have fostered and encouraged this story into existence, and I am grateful to you for helping me keep my sanity through the last four years.

The epilogue remains, still, but tonight I'm posting the final chapter of Anywhere Out of This World. I can't believe it. It's done.

Here's the latest:
The Angels Sing, Chapter 71 of Anywhere Out of This World
Word Count: 2,770
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Character Death
Summary: The world ends. Kinda.

Here is the next chapter of Anywhere Out of This World. This is the second to last chapter, which for me is really hard to believe. The last chapter is also written, and I'm in the process of editing. After it's done, I'll write the epilogue, and the whole story - representing four years of writin! - will be complete.

More very soon...

Here's the latest:
Run, Chapter 70 of Anywhere Out of This World
Word Count: 2,400
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Character Death
Summary: In Sunnydale, Dawn has leapt into the portal, which has closed the gateways between worlds, which foils Ripper's plan for summoning the Old One, but effectively traps Buffy there. With the help of Jonathan and Andrew, Buffy takes down Ripper and the Coven, but with TriadCorp in the process of imploding, getting out requires an even bigger cost.

Author's Note: This one actually has some Spuffy!

Happy New Year, everyone!!

I have a new chapter to post, to ring in the New Year. My goal was to finish this story before the end of Christmas break, which means I will have to keep working at this pace to complete it by Sunday. But it will be done! I have a bit of creative tunnel vision right now. For the past four days, I have done little else but write.

Here's the latest:
This Is How the World Will End, Chapter 69 of Anywhere Out of This World
Word Count: 3,190
Rating: PG-13 for more blood and graphic violence.
Warnings: Character death.
Summary: Faith battles Luxe, who explains his role in the present Apocalypse. Triumvirate is still overrun with destruction-bent demons, but the Slayers arrive to help level the field. Giles and Rachel pay a high price for trying to help Andrew.

Author's Note: Special gratitude for my daughter, Katya, to my roomie, Matt, and to spikes_heart and kimrae1977  for being patient, supporting and encouraging. You've helped me keep my head, especially in this last week!

To everyone - I wish you a healthy, safe, and prosperous year in 2009

*Hugs f-list*

Many blessings! 

So okay, moving right along now, I have the next chapter in Anywhere Out of This World. This will be a to-the-point post, as I'm in the middle of working on the next one. The pressure to finish is still on since I only have until this weekend to get it written.

Here's the latest:
Hopeless, Chapter 68 of Anywhere Out of This World
Word Count: 3,100
Rating: PG-13 for more blood and graphic violence.
Warnings: Character death
Summary: Willow completes the ritual, letting in all manner of demonkind, including Luxe, who commands his army right into what's left of Triumvirate. Meanwhile, three events occur simultaneously that close the portals Dawn has opened.

Almost there. I'm figuratively panting right now. I've written and re-written this one, but it's ready and the end is nigh, both for the story and for the characters. More very soon, too. Promise.

Here's the latest:
Primal, Chapter 67 of Anywhere Out of This World
Word Count: 2,775
Rating: PG-13, for lots of blood
Summary: All Hell breaks loose as Willow gets stabby on Dawn. William tries to her, but the portal is growing out of control. As Connor and Faith continue to fight, Connor tips his hand but not before someone gets killed.
Warning: Character death. Sorry!

I'm reposting today because in my haste to get it posted last night, I went unbeta'd. Well, he read the chapter this morning and found many errors, which I have now corrected.

Thank the stars for betas!!

Here's the latest (again):
Time is Running Out, Chapter 66 of Anywhere Out of This World
Word Count: 1,900
Rating: PG
Summary: Dawn opens the portals between worlds, unleashing chaos all over the place, and Willow has to make a difficult decision.

Finally, we made it to Christmas break! My students deserve this well-earned time off after three weeks of testing, and I think I deserve it, too, because I had to watch them take all of those horrible tests.

In celebration of the first day off, I have a chapter to offer: the first in almost a month. I am attempting to finish this story in the next two weeks. I know I've been attempting that for a year now, but I believe this time it's going to be possible.  

Here's the latest:
Time is Running Out, Chapter 66 of Anywhere Out of This World
Word Count: 1,900
Rating: PG
Summary: Dawn opens the portals between worlds, unleashing chaos all over the place, and Willow has to make a difficult decision.

Heading into the holiday season now, which is always rush-a-boom. Just wanted to pop in to let you know that I am writing, albeit slowly, and have 550 words toward the next chapter in Anywhere Out of This World. I feel that if I can managed one whole weekend of silent, sequestered time, I can finish this story off.

Many things have been happening of note lately  - the most important being my daughter's big win. She took first place in an essay contest about Family Traditions.

We are both buzzing with excitement and ideas, but we're also counting the days to Christmas break so that we can write in peace! I'll have more to post very soon. Promise!

Heavens, I miss y'all!

Back on schedule now, I have the next brief chapter of Anywhere Out of This World. Katya and I went horseback riding this weekend, and even though we didn't get to stay as long as we originally hoped, we did have a great time, and we used the rest of our weekend toward creative pursuits. She's writing a new original fiction, and I've finished another chapter. If it keeps up like this... well, I'm not going to say anything because I'll just wind up jinxing myself!

Here's the latest:
Eleventh Hour, Chapter 64 of Anywhere Out of This World
Word Count: 1,990
Rating: PG
Summary: Dawn draws a path between the Flat and Triumvirate, just in time to spare Lorne, Clem, and Oz from a deadly rugby match against the Sulksquelawtna Demon Clan, but unexpectedly, their Master turns up to level the playing field.
Disclaimer: For fun and fun alone. All hail the great and mighty Joss.

Okay, so it's been well over a month since I posted last, and my feeling of connection to the world of Buffy is like a stratospheric kite string keeping me tethered to my creative side. Thank the gods for Buffy, and Buffy fans, and Buffy fanfic.

That said, I do have a new chapter to post. I'm now projecting a Christmas break deadline for this story's completion as this year's school schedule is way more labor-intensive than I imagined.

Anyway,I hope that you enjoy the new chapter, and can forgive my long absences. As I promised, I will finish this story. It just may take longer than I thought.

Here's the latest:
Home Sweet Gone, Chapter 63 of Anywhere Out of This World
Word Count: 2,500
Rating: PG
Summary: Dawn begins to close the doors she's created, and bad things happen.
Disclaimer: For fun and fun alone. All hail the great and mighty Joss.
Special thanks to Spike's Heart, Kimmie, Mattallicarock, Steven_H for their continued support.
You keep me going, even when the coffee's run out.

Though I was doing well and making progress on Anywhere Out of This World, I did not meet my goal for finishing this saga before the end of the summer. School begins on Monday, and as it always happens, my (laughing even as I type) free time evaporates until mid-September. I have several scenes sketched out, but right now they are scattered and incomplete.

I feel I should say something profound about summer's end, about how each new year brings an opportunity to impart knowledge to a fresh batch of young minds, or about how I lament the coming of autumn because it is the time when the partitions in my mind must be erected, dividing my teacher-brain from the writer-brain. I should say something to that effect, but I've spent the last week moving classrooms and hanging posters so I'm whiny and exhausted. Hopefully that won't set the tone for the year!

I will try to have something new posted before the end of September. Sometimes really good things spring from times of stress, and the start of a school year can hardly be called anything less.

Much love, and to my students, new and old: be kind to your teachers. We are, believe it or not, regular human types just trying to live our lives.

I have the new chapter to post today. During the drafting stage, I tried to focus on Dawn's needs and motivations, and kept coming back to her uniqueness, her singularity. I knew I also had to address Connor in this chapter, too, and realized (again) that they have similar thematic qualities - they are alone in the world. This fact is exploited by Dawn in this chapter as she explores the possibilities of her powers. It's also exploited for Connor by the Glass, which has preyed upon his fragmented past
to manipulate him.

Well, that's where I got the title, anyway. This chapter also features much chaos among the Scoobies as William returns home to find Thellian there, and that Xander has thrown Andrew out, much like they once did to Buffy.

So, here's the latest:  
Singular, Chapter 55 of Anywhere Out of This World
Word Count: 2,600
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: For fun and fun alone. All hail the great and powerful Joss. Original characters Thellian Ventrusca, Maya Rose, and Rachel Greenspan are mine, however, but they like to play in the Jossverse. 

If this chapter was an episode of Friends, it would be titled "The One With All the Exposition." There had to be some plain old plot revealed at one point, and this chapter is it. The narrator of all this exposition is Warren, voted Least Likely to be a Good Guy, and yet he is.

Here's the latest:
Human Hands, Chapter 54 of Anywhere Out of This World
Word Count: 2,730
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: For fun and fun alone. All hail the great and might Joss. Also, Cthulhu belongs to H. P. Lovecraft, and both are mentioned in this chapter.
Summary: Luxe finds an occupation for Oz's werewolf demon. Warren attempts to rescue Buffy from prison, and explains some of Ripper's plans, from an insider's perspective. 

Thanks to my beta, Mattallicarock, spikes_heart, and kimrae1977for their inspiration and encouragement. You guys are made of awesomeness!

I  have the first of two chapters of Anywhere Out of This World written this week ready to post. The first, titled Asunder, concerns Oz, Lorne and Clem as they attempt to deal with Sabnock, the demon who has decided that Triumvirate should be his. Walter and Anya also have a small but important part which segues into the next chapter. In the next chapter, which is still with the wonderful beta and has no proper title yet, concerns Luxe as he prepares to make his final move for world domination.

These chapters are challenging because they are necessary to the plot and setting up the climax, but they shouldn't be so busy that they detract from the overall action. Many special thanks to Spikes_Heart for her gentle, kind direction in this regard.

Here's the latest:
Asunder, Chapter 53 of Anywhere Out of This World
Word Count: 2,080
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: For fun and fun alone. All hail the great and mighty Joss, who owns all of the characters except for Walter, Luxe, Helli, Maya, Sabnock, Rachel Greenspan and Thellian Ventrusca. They are my pets and do my bidding. Usually. Sometimes they run off on their own, which is always fun